Great Minds Think Alike

Well....they've been using the Horror Mask idea for years......

Fifty Not Out

Well, excuse me....

But where have all the years gone?

Help your children terrify the neighbours this Halloween

With the new "Nazi Nick" Horror Mask!

If your kids are tired of getting out-of-date sweets and foreign coins when they go out "Trick or Treating", then it's time they got their revenge.

Imagine how your neighbours will react when they open the door next Saturday evening and find themselves facing a group of 4 foot high Nick Griffins?

Hand-made (by white people only) in genuine latex, this mask will guarantee that your neighbours never want to open their front doors again.

Price £9.95 in a presentation box.
Sizes: Fat and Extra Fat.
Glows in the dark.
Sings the "Horst Wessel" when you open the box.

I Predict a Riot

Or not, as the case may be......

With less than half an hour to go, I can't help wondering if we're about to watch something of a damp squib on Question Time as Nick Griffin dons his best "Sound of Music type Nazi" costume and tried to be the friend of "honest, hard-working families" throughout the UK.

Wasn't that what Labour were meant to be for? Perhaps Margaret Hodge has got something right at last.

If you want to find someone to blame for the rise of the neo-Nazis, blame the failure of Nu-Labour.

BNP to amend its constitution

In an order issued at the Central London County Court, the BNP agreed to use "all reasonable endeavours" to revise its constitution so it did not discriminate on "protected characteristics" including race, gender and religious belief.

This could get funny....

Arise Lord Gorbals!

"Ah've got a receipt - d'ye think ah can claim fer it on mah expenses?"

No great surprise

Rather as I predicted back in March, Jaqui Smith will not be facing any punishment for the shameless way she and her husband have ripped off the British taxpayer.

Instead, she is going to to make an apology to the House of Commons....to a chamber full of people who have also been ripping off the British taxpayer for years....

I wonder if her "sorry" will be as in "I'm sorry and ashamed of my greed" or "I'm sorry I got caught at it"?

One rule for us, another rule for them....

Who's been a naughty boy, then?

The bad smell that lingers in the air around Westminster just won't go away.

It looks like even more politicians will be invited to pay back money that they have claimed from the taxpayer.

It seems that both Gordon and his buddy Lord Paul have both been caught with their hands in the cookie jar.

Unlike medieval times, when thieves could expect to be branded on the forehead, no doubt a slap on the wrist beckons for them both...

Obama is awarded the Nobel Peace Prize

So, Mr President, nine months on - what have you achieved?

Where Tony Blair should really be

And not at a Memorial Service for the brave boys and girls who he sent to an early grave.

Harriet's Driving School

What will they do after they lose the next election?

(First in a series of many)

Harriet Harman is going to open a Driving School which will teach people how to drive and use their mobile phone at the same time.

Prospective clients will include:

• People who are so important that the law on the use of mobile phones (whilst driving) doesn't apply to them.

• People who, despite being paid a fortune each year, are too mean to have a car kit fitted.

• People who have a pressing reason for leaving the scene of an accident that they have caused without leaving details of their insurance? Whatever that might be....
  

Gordon's interview with Adam Boulton on Sky News

Before the image-editing software was applied....